Thirty-One Tips for Victory

To help you connect with your inner Victorious Woman, the Victorious Woman Project has a free download of the Victorious Woman Month Calendar. Each day has a tip for connecting with your amazing Victorious Woman SELF - and inviting others to join you in this wonderful celebration of women.

It's fun and inspiring, and available at http://tinyurl.com/victory09

Victorious Woman Month Starts Today!

May is International Victorious Woman Month.

The Victorious Woman Project, whose mission is to empower women to love their lives and live victoriously, is kicking off its annual Victorious Woman Month celebrations, starting with the Victorious Woman Essay Contest. The contest, open to all women worldwide, acknoledeges women for their specific achievements.

Unlike some awards which recognize specifc goals, the Victorious Woman Essay Contest welcomes women to showcase the emotional stretch they made to overcome obstacles they faced on their journey. Contest closes on May 13 and winners will be announced on May 30.

In addition to the annual contest, author and speaker Annmarie Kelly is offering three free teleseminars, the very special Victorious Woman Month Calendar (free download), will be featured on the radio and is hosting the annual Victorious Woman Celebration on May 28

How can you get involved?
1 - Sign on to the Victorious Woman mailing list for event listings announcements: www.victoriouswoman.com
2 - Enter the Victorious Woman Essay Contest - there's still time, you have until May 13 to submit your entry: http://www.victoriouswoman.com/vwcontest.htm
3 - Download the calendar and do the suggested activities: http://tinyurl.com/victory09
4 - Create your own Victorious Woman celebration May 28 and get your friends celebrating their own and each other's victories

Have an incredible and VICTORIOUS Month!

Susan Boyle - More than Britain's Talent

If you didn’t see and hear Susan Boyle on Britain’s Got Talent, check her out on YouTube.

Susan Boyle is a 47-year-old woman who says she’s never been kissed, in fact, she said she’s never even had a date. She still lives in the house in which she grew up and cared for her parents. Before dying, Susan’s mother told Susan to make something of herself. When Simon Cowell asked her why she hadn’t been successful with a singing career until now, Susan said she’d never been given the chance. She hoped the reality show would be her opportunity.

Can you imagine how Susan Boyle felt? Don’t you wonder how she had the guts to get on that stage? Then, after subtle mocking from not only Simon but the whole audience, don't you wonder how she still kept it together enough to sing...magnificently?

Susan Boyle did five things that opened the door for her: She believed in honoring her commitments, she honed her skill, never gave up, didn’t let her age stop her, and she showed up.

“So what?” you say, "What’s that mean to me?"

Maybe everything. Like Susan Boyle, you don't know where life is going to take you. If life hasn’t turned out the way you wanted, you don't pack it in. Instead, you do what Boyle did, you keep doing your best so that when opportunity comes your way, you're ready. Following Boyle's lead, here's how:

• Make a commitment to yourself and be serious about honoring it. It might also help if you commit to someone else, as in an accountability partner
• Keep practicing what you do best. Maybe it’s not singing in the choir. Maybe your talent is organization and the only practice you get is organizing and managing the volunteers at your child’s school. Keep doing it. Recently, I met a woman whose talent is sewing. One day she made a handbag that got so many compliments, she began making and selling them. In one year, her hobby has grown into a business and a nice income.
• NEVER give up. A dream deferred isn’t a dream denied.
• Too old? Nonsense! Sometimes opportunities come your way with the confidence of experience.
• SHOW UP – if you are always turning your back on an opportunity or saying “no, not now”, nothing will ever happen. You have to show up in your life by saying ‘yes’ to opportunities.

No matter where you are in your life, don’t go quietly into some obscure quiet life. Follow the Victorious Woman Model, just as Susan Boyle did, and LIVE OUT LOUD, IN LIVING COLOR.

In Victory,

Annmarie

Honoring Kay Presto During Women's Heritage Month

When I first found out about Kay Presto, I was really impressed with what she managed to do in motor sports at a time when women weren't very welcome. I could hardly wait to talk to her. That's when (nod to Paul Harvey) I got "the rest of the story."

It was 1971 and Kay was only at the car races that day because her daughter was "queen" of the annual event. In fact, when the sports editor of the local paper asked her to write a column, she told him she had no experience. Kay didn't really want the job; she had just left a job so she could write a book and finish raising her four children. But the more she resisted, the more he insisted.

Back then, Kay had no idea what was in store for her. Kay became the first woman photojournalist in motor sports and carved out a career that excites her to this day. Her experiences are great reminders of how far women have come, and that's why she is the special Women's Heritage Month Victorious Woman Honoree.

Kay is such fun to talk to and, each time I have, I've left our conversations inspired and energized. You will be too when you read Kay Presto's story at http://www.victoriouswoman.com/vwmonth.htm

Resilience Triumphes Tragedy

“I couldn’t have imagined that when I got out of the car that day, it would be the last time I would stand alone on my own two feet.”

Rosemarie Rossetti was talking about the day in 1998 that changed her life. It happened the weekend of Rosemarie and Mark’s 3rd wedding anniversary, on a beautiful Saturday afternoon in mid-June. Rosemarie and Mark decided the early summer weather was perfect for a bike ride. The couple mounted their bikes on the car and drove to their favorite bike path, a former railroad track that was part of Ohio’s “rails to trails” system. They rode side by side for a while, and then Rosemarie got a little bit ahead of Mark.

All of a sudden, there was a sound like a gunshot. Looking around, Rosemarie heard Mark shouting at her. She heard the panic in Mark's voice, took it as a warning, and sped up. It wasn’t what Mark was screaming for Rosemarie to do. What Mark saw when he looked around wasn’t someone with a gun. Instead, Mark saw was a 3.5 ton tree, laced with live electric power lines, falling toward Rosemarie. Mark watched helplessly as the tree crashed down, right on top of her. Rosemarie never knew what hit her.

Rosemarie's journey of resilience is a model for all of us - especially now, when all we seem to hear are the "ain't it awful" stories. As I said in my Fall'08 newsletter, "Though there’s no shortage of fear-laced, ominous messages about our economy, if you look at our history, DOWNTURNS – whether they are worldwide or personal – NEVER LAST FOREVER. Unless you let them." Rosemarie could have given up but as you'll read in her story, she took back her life. You will too!

Read Rosemarie's story and tell us your thoughts - including how you are being resilient and taking back your life. Also, learn more about Rosemarie Rossetti and about her Universal Design Living Laboratory.

In Victory,
Annmarie

Poverty to Prosperity for Hispanic Victorious Woman

When little Connie Harryman found the purple gloves in the dumping ground where her family scavenged, she was only dreaming of success. As she grew up, she could easily have gotten sidetracked by life's twists and turns...but she didn't.

Instead, Connie dug down inside and found her victorious self. As a result, she made her dreams come true. How she did it is the reason The Victorious Woman Project honored Connie as its January 2009 Victorious Woman.

Read her story and let me know what you think. Also, check out Connie's website.

Chatting with Dr. Sally Witt

What fun!

Last Saturday I was on Dr. Sally Witt's radio show on Blog Talk Radio. I know Dr. Sally, the "social networking maven" through the National Speaker's Association. She knows more than anyone I know about the business of social networking and recently spoke for our internet marketing conference...and received RAVE reviews. Dr. Sally combines a gentle, loving style with a natural effervescence. I had a lot of fun as we talked, laughed and shared information and women, success and victory. I think you'd enjoy listening to it so I linked the audio to the title of this blog.

Dr. Sally's radio show features experts on an eclectic group topics. For example, her guest on Friday was Tom Gray, an internet marketing guru. On Saturday's show, Dr. Sally teamed up with Heather Jumah of WealthSuccessandWomen, Inc., a site dedicated to empowering women through entrepreneurship. I was their first guest and was followed by Ruth Clark. Ruth started a company called Fashion Moves and designs clothing for people with disabilities. Her focus is on minimizing dressing challenges "for people who use wheelchairs or have other personal clothing needs" so those challenges don't interfere with their business and success. This week, guests include Daryl Snyder of Elevision and psychic Carol Obley.

Let me know how you like the show. I'd love your feedback.

Here are some websites you want to check out:
Sally Witt: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/drsallywit and dr.sallywitt.com
Heather Jumah: http://wealthsuccessandwomen.com/
Ruth Clark: http://www.fashionmoves.org/
Tom Gray: http://www.gemsolv.com/wordpress/

Caroline Kennedy and Karyn Greenstreet: The Million Dollar Difference

“I’m short, fat and have red hair.”

That’s how Karyn Greenstreet told me I’d recognize her. I laughed when she said it; her self-deprecating humor tickled me. A few days later, when meeting the well-known speaker and business coach at a conference, in a crowded hotel lobby, I recognized her instantly, and liked her immediately. Everything about Karyn was congruent and seemed to add to her confidence, which in turn, added to her credibility. By day’s end, everyone who attended her sessions felt the same way.

Congruency is something I think too few of us understand when it comes to success and our careers. According to the research, people make up their minds about us within the first second or two of meeting us. If we aren’t crystal clear about who we are and what we’re doing, it comes across. When we aren’t congruent, it’s almost like putting an invisible question mark over our name and image. Then, no matter how good we are in our entrepreneurial or corporate ventures, the cloud of uncertainty sticks in the minds of those we meet; unfortunately, it negatively impacts our career – and usually we can never figure out why.

It’s like Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg. For all the political power of the Kennedy machine, most people thought that Caroline Kennedy either didn’t really want the job or wasn’t qualified for it. It didn’t matter that her press statements insisted that she believed she would make a good senator for New York. When it came to her interviews, her incongruence was painfully obvious. Even worse, it was in stark contrast to the strong messages she conveyed during appearances in support of then-candidate Barack Obama. Unfortunately, when it came to her own prospects for Congress, Ms. Schlossberg never really seemed to embrace the idea of political life. In the end, she withdrew her name from consideration.

Do you think you are more like Karyn Greenstreet or Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg? How congruent are you? Does everything match? Do your attitudes and words match your look and behaviors?

If you aren’t getting where you want to go, maybe you need to look inside as well as outside, and ask yourself if the messages you are sending out to the public line up with what’s going on in your head and heart. Maybe there conflicts going on that you might not be aware of, but which others can clearly see.

If you don’t feel your passion for a business or a topic, others will feel it. If you are touting talking points you don’t fully embrace, others will know. If your work doesn’t match your values, it will show.

Which brings me back to Karyn Greenstreet…

Karyn’s passion is small business. Earlier this month she spoke for my National Speakers Association Mid-Atlantic chapter’s annual conference. She spoke about Search Engine Optimization (SEO) for small businesses. She delivered two great presentations and wowed our attendees with her knowledge and generosity in sharing information. Her coaching business is thriving and I believe it isn’t only because she’s knows her stuff. She does, of course, but also, she’s totally jazzed about what she does. She’s authentic from the inside out – and so self-accepting that she makes short, fat and red hair a plus for her image. People see her, feel how real she is, and believe she’s got what they need.

Check out Karyn’s website at www.passionforbusiness.com

New Year's Resolution - Success Tips for Women

New Year, New You, right? HARDLY!

Did you know that women are more likely than men to make New Year's Resolutions (74% vs. 58%), yet only 14% of women actually succeed in following through on their good intentions? What happens?

I think it's that we tend to underestimate how much emotional energy we need to succeed. If you ask a hundred women why they quit working on a specific goal (and I have), most of the reasons will boil down to being emotionally worn out. The average woman gives so much to so many, and usually keeps very little for herself. It's one of the key ways we differ from men.”

As you plan to ring in 2009, I have some tips that takes emotional meltdowns into consideration. This year, you'll not only make a resolution, but be successful in keeping it. Here are the first two:

1. Pump Up The Passion. If accomplishing your New Year’s Resolution seems like a lot of work that doesn’t give you a lot of benefit, you’ll fail. Your reward has to outweigh the challenges.

What is it about your resolution that really jazzes you? For instance, why do you want a promotion? If you want it because it will give you more money or power, in what specific ways will money or power make your life better, happier or more satisfying? List the benefits and keep adding to them. Make the end result so incredibly attractive that you’ll keep going when the going gets tough – and it will.

2. Think ahead. As you planned recent holiday events, did you think about that one guest who doesn't eat meat, and made sure there was something vegetarian on the menu? Or what about the relative that is moody or drinks to much - didn't you anticipate what could go wrong and make a plan to handle it? Of course, you did. Women do it all the time for everyone else, both in and out of work, but we usually don’t think to apply the same process to our own success.

What do you think can be an obstacle to your success? If you want to get thin, what usually gets in your way of losing weight? Maybe you get home from work and just eat whatever is available, or eat fast food. So preplan your meals, including a quick snack that you can eat while you get the meal ready.

If you want to get a promotion at work, what do you think will stop you? Are you the kind of person who plays herself too small? Then get a book that will help you do better. I like the book BRAG! by Peggy Klaus. In fact, my Dangerous Dining Book Club read it in November, and we all agreed that we could learn to brag better.

Check back during January for more tips. And, email me to share ones that you've had success with...I look forward to hearing from you.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Washington Crossed the Delaware on Christmas - and So Did I!

It was freezing that day in 1776. General George Washington and his troops crossed from Pennsylvania into New Jersey during the American Revolutionary War. Washington devised the battle plan in an effort the keep British troops at bay. The strategy required his troops to cross the half-frozen river on a bitter cold Christmas day. It was a daring move, and it could have been a disaster, but it wasn't.

Every year, the famous crossing is reenacted. This year I was part of it. I didn't cross the river by boat (no one did - the waters were wild and dangerous), but I did walk across the Delaware on a wooden foot bridge. Bridges are a challenge for me, and when the opportunity appeared, I thought twice about going. But, using the steel handrail to steady myself, I took the 30-40 minute walk to New Jersey and back. It wasn't too cold and I dressed warmly, but the swirling waters beneath me made me a little dizzy...and I second-guessed my decision.

When I got back on solid ground, I was glad. I think it's good for me to move out of my comfort zone and challenge myself - and I think it's good for you too. I have some "getting started" ideas in my current newsletter. You can get the current issue by clicking on this post's title.

Hope and That Little Town of Bethlehem

“O Little Town of Bethlehem” - you probably sang it this season, or at least heard it. Did you know the words were written in 1868, by a minister from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania? Isn't it amazing how timeless the sentiment is – “the hopes and fears of all the years” - fitting both a post-Civil War economy and a current-day recession. They are both part of our human experience.

Yet, if you focus on fear, you can make yourself a nervous wreck. Since you're constantly bombarded with negative news, you can worry about the economy, jobs and the state of the world, wondering what’s going to happen next. Maybe you have forgotten what it means to live within your means and, like so many of us, wrap values around the money-made “show” of your life, instead of the value-driven “flow” of it.

Still, in the midst of all the negativity, you can choose to feel hope. I do.

Many economists think that the economy will turn around by next fall. I hope they’re right. However, it’s in women that I have the most hope. It’s in you and me and the other women in my town – and yours. We are leaders in our families, at work, and in our communities. We all have a wonderful opportunity to learn (or maybe relearn) lessons about what we value that has nothing to do with money, and everything to do with meaningful living – or as pastor Rick Warren would describe – a purpose-driven life.

As you think about your life and the future this Christmas Day 2008, and your hopes and fears, what are some of the values you would like to focus on throughout this holiday season and into 2009? Will you refocus your behaviors to be more in line with integrity and honesty? Will your spending habits reflect good sense instead of instant gratification? What about practicing perseverance instead of giving up and focused living instead scattered and imbalanced lifestyles?

What values will be shaping your life over the next year or so? How about sharing them with other readers - you'll never know who you'll be helping!

Thanksgiving 2008

Even though it's Thanksgiving, there seems to be nearly no way to avoid the doom and gloom news about how bad the economy. If you are one of those who is stressed out and worrying yourself sleepless because of money matters, here's a suggestion for a first-step toward financial peace and personal empowerment: PRACTICE GRATITUDE DAILY.

Don't roll your eyes...there is actual research that shows that those who practice gratitude aren't merely happier - though, frankly, wouldn't that be enough of a reason? In fact, research shows the attitude of gratitude also makes you healthier, more social, AND less dependent on material things to satisfy your needs and desires. In a tough economy, happiness helps you to adjust to change, sociability enables you to still have fun without spending tons of bucks, and less dependence on material things guides your spending and keeps you sane.

If you aren't already seeing your family, friends, job, house, etc. with a grateful eye, Thanksgiving is the perfect day to start. In everything you do today, think about what's good about it. Think about little things, like how good your bed feels and what a beautiful day it is. Then make a list of everyone you love and, thinking about every person you love, find one good thing about them for which you are thankful.

As you go through your day, refuse to focus on the imperfection and instead, find something good about it. If you don't like turkey, think about how good the desserts are. If you have a miserable relative who always makes trouble at dinner, be grateful that you'll go home without him or her.

If it seems hard, make a game of it with yourself and the people around you. Challenge each other to find good in whatever is going on around you. Make it serious...not joking about it.

Life isn't perfect, so stop looking for it to be that way. Look instead for what's good about your life, and be grateful. Consistently practicing gratitude will set you on a healtier path toward victory.

Personally, I am so grateful that I live in God's abundant universe and that my life is filled with wonderful people. That includes you!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Today’s Economy: Thriver Tips for Women

Economists, financial commentators and even Oprah and Suze Orman have been warning us for years that a crisis was coming and our personal finances would be hit pretty hard. Now it’s here. The economy is who-knows-where, your 401K is a joke and the stock market’s ups and downs are making you feel queasier than riding a roller coaster. Whether you’re watching CNN, MSNBC, or your local news, all you hear at every turn is FEAR, FEAR, FEAR. You’re scared about what’s going to happen next and that this crisis could last for years. You know you set the tone in your life and in your household, what do you do?

The good news is that we’re all in this together, so as we make changes in our lifestyles, we won’t be alone. BUT, we each have to take responsibility for our own finances. That means YOU have to take action. Where do you start? What ideas do you have for dealing with this economy?

Send your tips to me, at info@victoriouswoman.com, and I'll send you my article, The Victorious Woman's Guide to Thriving, with SIX STEPS you can take to thrive inspite of today's current economic woes - starting today,

Pennsylvania Votes!

I live in the red hot voting suburbs of Chester County, in "battleground" Pennsylvania. I'm a regular voter and usually walk in and out. This morning, however, I waited in the longest voting line of my lifetime. On my way out, the line had doubled. It seems that, this election, everyone wants to be heard.

Poll workers made the wait tolerable. They had donuts, coffee and even freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. I spent the time reading a book I brought and chatting with neighbors I hadn't seen since the summer. My greatest stress was wondering how long my bladder would hold out. It did...just barely.

While I waited, I couldn't help but think that, no matter who wins, this is exciting. It's what our wonderful democracy is about, that is, being a population caring enough to make our vote heard. It's what “let freedom rings” means. Those aren't just words, it’s us we’re talking about – we’re freedom and our vote is our right to be heard, our freedom ringing. Not everyone around the world can do that, and it's what makes today so important, in so many ways.

When we vote, it’s one of the ways we express our approval or disapproval of the current system. And, it isn’t just about voting for a president once every four years. We have the priviledge of choosing our legislative representatives too, and we do that more often.

As a victorious woman, you know you have to stay on top of the events that affect your life. Yet too many of us don't know common civics. So, just in case you don’t already know, here are a few freedom-ringer basics:

• There are three branches of our government at the national and state levels: executive, judicial and legislative.

• We have two kinds of elections: general elections and primary elections.

• The people who run in the general elections, held in November, are picked in the primary elections, usually held in the spring; we vote for them based on our party affiliation.

• The President and his crew (the Cabinet) are the Executive Branch of government.

• The Supreme Court is the Judicial Branch. Their job is to interpret the laws that Congress makes, based on our constitution. When a judge retires or dies, the president chooses a new judge to fill his/her place. If the president is a conservative (like Reagan or Bush), s/he is likely to add conservative judges while a liberal president, like Clinton, will probably add more liberal judges.

• Our Senators and Representatives make up the Legislative Branch. They write the bills and make the laws that shape our way of life. Unfortunately, especially in recent years, they are also the ones who have added millions and millions of dollars worth of “junk” spending - usually to pay back the special interest groups who ply the legislature with special perks. No party is clean when it comes to porkbarrel spending...they are all equally guilty of spending our money on their special interests.

• To understand the legislative process, go to YouTube and watch the three minute cartoon, “Schoolhouse Rock – How a Bill Becomes A Law".

• You can find out how your senators and representative vote on many websites, like govtrack.us, votesmart.org, politico.org, thomas.loc.gov. You can find out what bills are voted on, which legislator voted and how, what kind of pork was included, and even find out who’s lobbying your politicians for votes for their special interests.

Once today’s votes are counted, we’ll have a new president. My hope is all of us who cared enough to stand in line today will keep the momentum rolling, get involved and make a difference. Unlike professional sports, politics isn't a game to watch and then go about our lives. The outcome really matters.

As the weeks go on, and the new president takes office and congress starts a new term, make a point to listen and read and evaluate the facts. Be wary of journalists, commentators and pundits. In the past, they prided themselves on keeping their politics private, but most of them no longer do. Just as the porkbarrel spending has increased, journalistic integrity has decreased. Instead, trust yourself and pay attention to the facts. When you know what’s going on, you – and we - can make our voices heard. WE can be loud enough to overshadow the lobbyists, and WE can hold our politicians to a standard that includes serving our best interests...not theirs.

It's our civic right...and responsibility. Let freedom ring!

Gibson Too Tough on Palin?

So, women, what did you think of Sarah Palin's first interview? Today's buzz is all about whether Charlie Gibson was too tough on her or not. What do the pundits think we're supposed to be, whiny marshmallow chicks who can't hold our own in high positions?

Here's my Victorious Woman perspective - NO!

Sarah Palin is running for the second highest office in the US. Most of us know little about her and want to know who she is. Journalists should ask tough questions, to Palin...and all the candidates. You can't run for the highest offices and expect a pass because of gender...or race.

And therein lies the problem, as I see it. Barack Obama wasn't vetted much more than Palin before he stepped onto the national stage. When people wanted to know more, the press (who we should be able to trust to be unbiased) went crazy. Media coverage became so obviously Obama-d that (1) the Campbell Brown-hosted debate was parodied on Saturday Night Live (check YouTube) and even (2) the Democratic Governor of Pennsylvania, Ed Rendell, said the Obama coverage was "embarrassing" and that "certain media outlets were openly partisan, had really bought into Barack Obama as a savior."

Clearly, a real journalist who is doing her/his job, should be asking questions that show us a candidate's character. We all know their canned party line - no matter which party they are. It's the hard questions that show us who the candidate really is.

To all of you who embrace the Victorious Woman in you, and who want the best for all of us, here's my advice for the next two months:

1. Learn everything you can about the candidates. Look at their records. How have they voted and what have they done? Get online and get facts - not some writer's or commentator's opinion. Even if you surf around the political net for just 10-15 minutes a day, you can learn some interesting facts, instead of getting stuck with some cherry-picked soundbites in an ad.

2. Look for the candidate's congruence? In other words, do their current behaviors and history match their past ones?

3. When you hear a candidate speak, listen for their attitudes and beliefs. Find the person behind the words. Why? Because, when elected, that's who you'll see in the White House. When the president and vice-president are in office, they are under extreme stress. When you and I are under stress, we revert to our core values and character. So do they...and that's what you want to watch for in this election.

4. Be wary of preferential treatment, whether it's NBC, ABC, CNN, PBS, FOX, NY Times, Huffington Post, Bill O'Reilly...anyplace. If a journalist only gives a candidate softballs, we simply get to know a bunch of words. We don't get to know them.

To my American readers, when you vote in November - and voting is your sacred right - make sure you are voting for the candidate who most aligns with your values and vision.

In victory,
Annmarie

Sarah Palin – How sexist is it?

What do you think about all the questions regarding Sarah Palin’s ability to serve as vice president because she has five children? Though still on vacation in Maine, but with both Democratic and Republican conventions going on, I can't help but getting political news...and it's making my blood boil. Last week I watched sexism happen with Hillary's speech supporting Barack Obama (see my thoughts in a previous blog below). This week, it's another kind of sexism with Sarah Palin.

Did anyone question Joe Biden when he suffered the tragic loss of his spouse and daughter in a car accident that left his two sons hospitalized for extended periods? Biden was a single parent who admitted that being a parent was more important than serving in the US Congress. He decided not to live in Washington so he could be home with his kids at night? Did anyone tell him to quit? NO. In fact, his was encouraged to continue his political career.

How about John Edwards? He’s an older father of two very young children and his spouse is battling life-threatening cancer. During his run for the presidential nomination, who questioned his ability to focus on the presidency because he was in the midst of personal crisis? NO ONE.

So, why is anyone discussing Sarah Palin’s ability to do her job while raising a family? Palin has already proved she can do a high profile job. Just like you, she is capable of functioning in higher level positions and raising a family.

This issue is about more than a female vice-president. It’s about you and your future success. Sure you can get those mid-level managerial jobs, but what about the executive positions. Do you think your career is suffering due to sexist-related concerns?

Tell me what you think.

By the way, check out my latest newsletter’s skillbuilding article and victory stretch about working women and guilt – with an Olympic twist.

Hillary Clinton - How sexist is it?

Call it what you will, but long story short, the Democratic Party asked Hillary to step down so they could nominate Barack Obama. This time last year, Hillary was all but promised the nomination. Suddenly, the “super delegates” who once couldn’t wait to see Hillary be president, shifted to Obama. Adding salt to the wound, now the Dems have asked for Hillary’s help to get Obama elected.

Has that ever happened to you? Were you ever the frontrunner for a promotion and, in the end, were not only passed over for a less qualified male candidate, but then also asked to help get the man who got the promotion get up to speed?

How did you handle it? Let me hear from you so we can pass along your tips to other women.

Edwards and Hunter - What's Wrong?

So it’s happened again. Another ego-driven politician in a sex scandal swearing it isn’t true until (surprise!) there’s proof. Nothing new, just change the names and faces to Clinton, Morris, or any of the amazingly long list, and it’s the same story.

There is no justification for what Edwards did – and he agrees. And who knows if this is the first time…or just the first time Edwards got caught.

And what about Rielle Hunter?
She’s an over-forty woman who is old enough to know better. She knew John Edwards was married with children – including a couple young ones – and knew he was in all the media, including on Oprah, talking about his politics and fluffing about his relationship with his spouse. Then, and now, she knows Elizabeth Edwards is suffering from an incurable cancer. So why did she go after him?? Or, maybe Edwards pursued her. If that's the case, why did she go along with it?

Yes, I know. Stuff happens. I live in the real world. I was single for a long time and had plenty of chances to have affairs with married men. And there was even a time or two when, during a lonely or particularly difficult time, I considered it. I didn’t do it because it was wrong. Though it seems in our society as though we’ve gotten away from making judgments about what is right and what is wrong, that doesn’t change the facts.

In Hunter’s case, she’s brought a child into the world in scandal – married man, maybe more than one man could be the father. That sordid story will haunt that innocent baby throughout her whole life. Even after the tabloids die down, even fifty years from now, there will always be a rumor or a whisper about her mother’s disgraceful digression and her father’s true identity.

What’s the solution? There isn’t one.

So what's in all they hype for you? There is something you can learn from Hunter and Edwards.

YOU CAN CHOOSE a code of conduct that lifts you up instead of dragging you (and your loved ones) down. You can choose to put certain behaviors on the DO NOT list. It’s like people who quit smoking. They know they can't have a cigarette. I know. When I stopped, I decided that I would never pick up a cigarette and smoke it. I know, even now, if I pick up a cigarette today, I’d be back to a pack-a-day by tomorrow. So I just don’t do it.

Think of the people on a diet or who have a food allergy. They cut out a food, like peanuts or fried foods. Whether they want them or not, those items just can’t be on their menu. They can look at the peanuts or fries, and maybe yearn for them, but they just don’t have ‘em.

Here are my suggestions for a couple “off my list” dating decisions:
• You will make decisions that protect you now and in the future;
• you won’t have sex unless your man is using a condom – no exceptions;
• you won’t date men with bad tempers or possessive behaviors
• you will break up with a guy as soon as he demonstrates the bad behaviors on your “no” list;
• you won’t knowingly date a married man;
• and, if the guy lied and really is married, you will dump him, no matter how much you think you love him. You’ll do it because you deserve better!

In the end, whatever happens, you will experience the law of cause and effect. When you make the cause – that is, your behavior – strong with healthy decisions and actions, your effect is bound to be good. Yes, stuff happens, but even when it happens to you, you are always in control of how you respond.

Choose to be the BEST of who you are…and don’t let anyone or anything take you off your BEST LIFE course.

In victory,
Annmarie

NSA Week in New York City

Whew! What a week!

I just returned from the annual convention of the National Speakers Association, of which I’m a proud member. This year, NSAers met in eclectic New York City at a hotel right smack in the heart of Times Square.

For those of you who have been, you know just being in NYC is an experience. There is so much to do in NYC, from the diverse lower Manhattan, busy midtown, uptown with its Lincoln Center, Central Park, St. Pat’s and tons more in each of the 5 boros...and fagettaboutit in Brooklyn.

Since I live only a couple hours from NYC, we visit fairly often. Unlike many of my colleagues, it was no surprise to me how, at 11pm, the streets were as crowded as they were at 2pm. It really is the city that never sleeps. Street performers were in abundance, a SWAT team made sure competing anti-war/support the troops rallies stayed civil and a taxi driver actually got out of his taxi (while he had a fare inside) and physically threatened a pedestrian who yelled at him for making a turn too close to the curb - and the pedestrian took him on. It was all typical, tough New York City.
For me, the outside stuff was same old same old. It's what happened inside the hotel each day that was magic. On the main stage, Marshall Goldsmith, Steve Forbes, Cathie Black and Bill Strickland presented their keynotes. So did attorney and news anchor Manny Mandrano and humorist Bill Stainton. I’ll talk more about them in my next few blogs.

Though many of the seminars didn't have as many tips and techniques as I would have liked, I got a few gems from speakers and tons from the other participants. You’ll be benefiting from some of those in upcoming months.

The grand finale was the awards banquet. This annual formal dinner had its usual Oscar-like aura. However, unlike Hollywood’s awards nights, NSA’s newly designated CPAE's (an honor bestowed on the best of the best), gave gracious acceptance speeches. But it was Cavatt award-winner Mike McKinley's acceptance speech that brought me – and most of the audience – to tears. Mike was widowed a few years ago. His spouse was also a speaker and beloved NSA member. He fought hard to stay engaged with life, and his profession. He spoke about his late spouse with love and affection. He also spoke about his new bride, and how she helped pull him out of the depths of sadness. He was warm, touching, and at the same time, had us laughing through our tears.

This year, the NSA foundation raised over $60,000 and the Cigar Peg, the sometimes raunchy stepchild of the NSA, also raised over $60,000 for the NSA charities.

I’ve returned home newly inspired to give YOU - MY READERS AND CLIENTS - the best of my best. More than ever I’m committed to providing inspiration and education that will help you BE MORE of the person you truly are, DO MORE of what satisfies your soul and HAVE MORE of the life you were put here to live so you can do your part to positively change the world.

Now my job is to take action. Stay tuned.

Woman Survives Panic Disorder

Karen Muranko lived with panic disorder for over twenty years. Today, with the help of her support team, she’s a happy and healthy survivor of the disorder.

Her story placed 2nd in the 2008 Victorious Woman Essay Contest. She is this month’s Victorious Woman of the Month. You can read her winning essay at http://www.victoriouswoman.com/vwmonth.htm.

By the way, in case you missed reading about our 1st prize winner and how she helped her son cope with her divorce, click on http://www.victoriouswoman.com/Files/RosalindSedacca.pdf to read her 1st prize-winning essay.

In victory,
Annmarie