Hallmark, Gibson and the other greeting card companies tells us to buy expensive cards. Godiva and FTD tell us that the way we need to be romanced is with candy and flowers. But is that what you think Valentine’s Day is about? I don't. I think that stuff is for newbies and amateurs.
It's not that I don't like all that stuff, but I don’t put all my expectations into one single day. This time last year, my sweetie and I were driving through a snowstorm to pick up his mother from a nursing home to take her back to her assisted living apartment. By the time we got home, we were physically and emotionally drained. We had a quick bite and watched a funny DVD, during which we both fell asleep. Happy Valentine’s Day…!
I think the truth is that what every woman really wants is the love that Valentine’s Day promises, as well as its implied intimacy. Merely buying a card, flowers, or lingerie can’t make that happen. It’s like foreplay…if your man doesn’t make enough time for it, the big event itself is falls flat…and nothing else really matters. Even diamonds can’t make up for the emptiness resulting from thoughtlessness or casual disregard.
I talk to a lot of women who agree. They’d rather get their “candy” in the form of a planned event – like a date night or a day trip just for the two of them…where he holds her hand and they laugh together. And they’d love “flowers” in the form of more shared responsibility for the house, shopping and kids.
Last week my guy filled the soap dispensers…just because they were empty, and without being asked. Yesterday he helped me get something ready for a training program I’m doing next week. I can count on him to show me that I’m important in his life, and that what’s important to him is important to me.
How about you? What non-store item says, “I love you” to you?
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Monday, February 4, 2008
Black Women and the Election: In Today's News
If I was an African-American woman, I'd be pretty steamed with the news media right now. In fact, I'm not one, but I'm fired up on their behalf!
If you've been following the very tight Democratic primary races, you know that Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are in a dead heat for their party's nomination. As we approach the "super Tuesday" primaries, nearly every news outlet has made a point to highlight the black woman's quandry of whether to choose her race or her gender as she votes.
Are they kidding??
Don't they think there are any intelligent black women anywhere in this country...or at least in the super Tuesday states? Do they think that black women are that uninformed or ignorant that their only criteria is race or gender??
While it's true that we are likely to vote for those who are most aligned with us, it's also true that we usually like some ideas of one candidate and some of another, and we have to choose. But to denigrate every African-American woman by telling us that their thought process is reduce to whether they will choose the black candidate or the woman? That is just insulting...to every woman.
Readers, make a point this year to prove the media and the political pundits wrong. In this most historical election, get so well-versed in the positions of the candidates that you'll embarranss anyone who wants to dumb you down to the superficial. When you choose the candidate who most closely aligns with your values, speak out on their behalf and give bullet point reasons for why you want them to be your president. Show your smarts to the world...and make them eat their small-minded words!
In victory,
Annmarie
If you've been following the very tight Democratic primary races, you know that Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama are in a dead heat for their party's nomination. As we approach the "super Tuesday" primaries, nearly every news outlet has made a point to highlight the black woman's quandry of whether to choose her race or her gender as she votes.
Are they kidding??
Don't they think there are any intelligent black women anywhere in this country...or at least in the super Tuesday states? Do they think that black women are that uninformed or ignorant that their only criteria is race or gender??
While it's true that we are likely to vote for those who are most aligned with us, it's also true that we usually like some ideas of one candidate and some of another, and we have to choose. But to denigrate every African-American woman by telling us that their thought process is reduce to whether they will choose the black candidate or the woman? That is just insulting...to every woman.
Readers, make a point this year to prove the media and the political pundits wrong. In this most historical election, get so well-versed in the positions of the candidates that you'll embarranss anyone who wants to dumb you down to the superficial. When you choose the candidate who most closely aligns with your values, speak out on their behalf and give bullet point reasons for why you want them to be your president. Show your smarts to the world...and make them eat their small-minded words!
In victory,
Annmarie
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