Edwards and Hunter - What's Wrong?

So it’s happened again. Another ego-driven politician in a sex scandal swearing it isn’t true until (surprise!) there’s proof. Nothing new, just change the names and faces to Clinton, Morris, or any of the amazingly long list, and it’s the same story.

There is no justification for what Edwards did – and he agrees. And who knows if this is the first time…or just the first time Edwards got caught.

And what about Rielle Hunter?
She’s an over-forty woman who is old enough to know better. She knew John Edwards was married with children – including a couple young ones – and knew he was in all the media, including on Oprah, talking about his politics and fluffing about his relationship with his spouse. Then, and now, she knows Elizabeth Edwards is suffering from an incurable cancer. So why did she go after him?? Or, maybe Edwards pursued her. If that's the case, why did she go along with it?

Yes, I know. Stuff happens. I live in the real world. I was single for a long time and had plenty of chances to have affairs with married men. And there was even a time or two when, during a lonely or particularly difficult time, I considered it. I didn’t do it because it was wrong. Though it seems in our society as though we’ve gotten away from making judgments about what is right and what is wrong, that doesn’t change the facts.

In Hunter’s case, she’s brought a child into the world in scandal – married man, maybe more than one man could be the father. That sordid story will haunt that innocent baby throughout her whole life. Even after the tabloids die down, even fifty years from now, there will always be a rumor or a whisper about her mother’s disgraceful digression and her father’s true identity.

What’s the solution? There isn’t one.

So what's in all they hype for you? There is something you can learn from Hunter and Edwards.

YOU CAN CHOOSE a code of conduct that lifts you up instead of dragging you (and your loved ones) down. You can choose to put certain behaviors on the DO NOT list. It’s like people who quit smoking. They know they can't have a cigarette. I know. When I stopped, I decided that I would never pick up a cigarette and smoke it. I know, even now, if I pick up a cigarette today, I’d be back to a pack-a-day by tomorrow. So I just don’t do it.

Think of the people on a diet or who have a food allergy. They cut out a food, like peanuts or fried foods. Whether they want them or not, those items just can’t be on their menu. They can look at the peanuts or fries, and maybe yearn for them, but they just don’t have ‘em.

Here are my suggestions for a couple “off my list” dating decisions:
• You will make decisions that protect you now and in the future;
• you won’t have sex unless your man is using a condom – no exceptions;
• you won’t date men with bad tempers or possessive behaviors
• you will break up with a guy as soon as he demonstrates the bad behaviors on your “no” list;
• you won’t knowingly date a married man;
• and, if the guy lied and really is married, you will dump him, no matter how much you think you love him. You’ll do it because you deserve better!

In the end, whatever happens, you will experience the law of cause and effect. When you make the cause – that is, your behavior – strong with healthy decisions and actions, your effect is bound to be good. Yes, stuff happens, but even when it happens to you, you are always in control of how you respond.

Choose to be the BEST of who you are…and don’t let anyone or anything take you off your BEST LIFE course.

In victory,
Annmarie